I was a junior in high school when depression crept up on me. I had been a hard working, optimistic high-school student with everything going for me. I was the junior class president, member of the National Honor

Society, Homecoming princess, a peer mediator, drama club member, and a swimming instructor. I also had numerous close friends and a supportive family.

Depression can strike at anytime; it caught me at the most vulnerable time in life--my teens--when raging hormones and increased responsibilities were already adding stress. Now I have learned that teens are actually more vulnerable to depression than other age groups because of their hormonal changes and pressures as they enter adulthood.

I began to feel empty, lonely, and helpless. To fill my emptiness, I began to overeat. During this time, I couldn't seem to get enough rest and began oversleeping, even during classes.

I felt like I was losing my mind--I could no longer remember what someone had said to me two minutes before. I could no longer concentrate. I would try to read a page in a book, but by the time my eyes reached the end of the page, I had no idea what I had just read.

My mind seemed to be trapped in another world, one full of hopelessness. I struggled each day to get through my daily events, yet no one--even mentioned that I was depressed. I never matched my symptoms to the illness of depression.

You can spot a depressed person right away by asking about his or her dreams and goals--they no longer have them. I no longer looked forward to graduation, my prom, college, a career, or even starting a family, which had always been my fondest dream. I was a 16-year-old girl trapped in a fast paced world without direction, hope, or a feeling of my own identity. I grew very angry with myself for having horrible feelings that I could not just "will" away. The more I pushed down the haunting thoughts and feelings, the closer I pushed myself to the edge. Behind my smiles and giggles, I did not want to see tomorrow.

On Sunday, May 3, 1998, I jumped from more than 100 feet to what I thought would be my death. I thought the impact of the water would knock me unconscious and that I would sink to the bottom. Thank God my plan was not successful. I rose to the surface and was rescued by nearby boaters. Somehow, I survived with only bruises.

That afternoon in the hospital, someone used the word depression to describe my condition for the first time. It was such a relief to finally have a reason for my disturbing thoughts and emotions. Hope became an option for me again when I learned that I was suffering from a treatable illness. I spent five days in a psychiatric hospital, where I met other teenagers with the same illness, yet different stories. Some starved themselves; some overate, took drugs, or withdrew--they all wanted an escape. I chose suicide. Unlike many others though, I was given a second chance at life.

I returned home to supportive friends and family, a daily dose of Paxil, and therapy once a week. I was optimistic, but I knew I had a long road to recovery. My decision to go public with my story has proved to be rewarding because of the amount of feedback that I am getting. It is so important to me that people be aware of depression.

Some people think that depression and suicide are topics too sensitive to discuss. How can we expect a suffering child to ask for help when there is no open communication on depression? I was a peer mediator and gave advice to many of my friends, but I had no idea I was depressed because I didn't know the symptoms. I didn't think depression could happen to me. Now I know that depression can happen to anyone. I have learned that teens' hormonal changes and the pressure of new responsibilities make them more vulnerable to depression.

It frightens me when I think that any of the Tech students I sit beside in class could be feeling the way I did two years ago. If you think someone close to you may be depressed, look for the signs. Is he or she oversleeping or suffering from insomnia? Has this person stopped eating or started overeating? Is he or she irritable? Does this person have trouble concentrating, remembering things, or keeping appointments? Has he or she lost interest in things that used to be fun? Tell them you are concerned about them and suggest they see a professional who can help determine what is causing the symptoms they are experiencing. The hardest step will be getting them to admit that they need help.

I hope that others will learn the most important lesson that I learneddepression is a battle that you cannot win on your own. I ask those who don't understand depression to get educated because you may have a friend who is affected by this illness, and he or she will need your help in the battle to recover. My family and friends have helped me in my struggles. I only wish I had admitted my problem before I jumped off the bridge. Depression gave me such tunnel vision that I didn't even think how it would affect my family if I had died that Sunday in May. The hardest thing for me to deal with still is how my attempt hurt my loved ones. I can only imagine how much worse their pain, guilt, and confusion would be if I hadn't survived.

I hope that my story can give others insight. I hope that those who hear about me will talk to their friends and family about depression and help me in my endeavor to spread the word that depression is a treatable illness.

A student who never scored below a B fails a class in her major. A young man with close friends in high school feels lost on a campus of thousands with no time in his grueling schedule for socializing. A senior is approaching graduation; her boyfriend wants her to follow him to Atlanta, but her parents are urging her to accept a job offer closer to home. She feels her life will be directed by this decision.

These situations are so common at Virginia Tech that hundreds of names could be substituted for the key players. For 40 to 50 students, the depression is so acute that suicide seems to them the only answer. Many, but not all, of these students make suicide attempts, says psychologist Brian Warren, director of Virginia Tech's Schiffert Health Center and the Cook Counseling Center. In a typical year, about 350 more students exhibit symptoms of depression serious enough to warrant concern about suicide, he says.

The counseling center is poised to act quickly, with counselors in various specialties available around the clock. After an initial consultation, severely depressed students are referred to a staff psychiatrist who can prescribe medication.

"The medications we use are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors--Prozac, Paxil, Luvox, and Serzone," says center psychiatrist Nancy Cinco. "This is the first line for sustained depression. We also check for a thyroid problem."

But the serious cases are only a portion of the depressed students seen at the counseling center. Between 2,000 and 2,300, or about 8-10 percent, of Tech's students seek help annually for depression, Warren says. This percentage mirrors the percentage of depression cases in the general population. Depression is a common problem, usually treatable with counseling and, if necessary, medication. In Warren's experience, a combination of the two prove most effective.

"Most students are seen two or three times. They may need help through a crisis or a stressful decision," Warren says. The loss of a love, through death or the ending of a relationship, can create a common situational depression usually treated with counseling.

But depression is a common illness that doesn't always require a painful situation to activate feelings of hopelessness or panic. Often students with a deep seated tendency toward depression find that the new challenges of college trigger a full blown case of depression.

"We diagnose a lot of freshmen," Cinco says. "They face the stress of leaving home for the first time and making major decisions on their own. Almost all did very well in school, and maybe they're having trouble academically or not fitting in very well. Many can't sleep, and that interferes with their moods. A lot are so tired they come to the clinic wondering if they have mononucleosis."

Because such symptoms are common among freshmen, the residence hall staff is trained to spot the warning signs of depression and refer students to the Cook Center.